For some reason, it is believed that maternal love is inherent in nature and comes with the child. But this is not always true in real life. There are women who have no maternal instinct at all. Why is this happening?
Even psychologists cannot answer this question unequivocally.
There are many reasons for not wanting to have children:
The reluctance to have children often lies in an unhappy childhood, when the parents worked hard and paid little attention to the child. Therefore, already as an adult, he decides to live without children for his own pleasure. This is especially true for men who are afraid to take responsibility for their families. But women do not lag behind in such a decision, realizing that with the birth of a child, life will change irrevocably and it will no longer be possible to build a career. And people are also afraid of being deprived of relative freedom.
Psychologists say that you need to mature for motherhood. But the matter does not always concern the age of future parents or their financial situation. There are examples when a woman does not want to have children because a sick child was born to one of her relatives or friends. There is also a fear of childbirth. Psychologists can help here so that a woman can overcome her phobias and become a mother.
Another important reason for choosing childlessness is the example of parents who worked hard for their children, and in some cases even reproached them for this. All this stuck in the subconscious and only gets stronger with age. People who grew up in families with many children rarely follow this example of their parents. Most often, they are limited to one or two children, or even decide to devote their lives to their beloved ones, and not caring for their offspring. The same problems arise for children raised by a constantly irritated single mother with an eternal lack of money.
The dispute between childless couples (childfree) who deliberately took this step, and those who cannot imagine their life without heirs, is ongoing. To resolve it in favor of one side is simply unrealistic, because everyone is free to choose what he needs for a happy life. People who try to impose their lifestyle are actually unhappy, although they post family photos on social networks, in which smiling and beautiful children. But a responsible person understands that a child is not a toy, but everyday hard work.