Skinny wives are not taken
Skinny girls were not quoted by our ancestors: they suddenly turn out to be sterile or cannot bear a child. Thinness was considered tantamount to pain, and a sick wife was not needed in the household. And the well-being of the parents, since they could not fatten, was questioned.
And there is a mole on the cheek, and in the eyes of love …
To the point … Now a mole on the cheek is a synonym for beauty, and before the owners of such (and indeed had some marks on the body: moles, scars, bruises, not to mention serious injuries) were not married. A runny nose or hoarseness could also affect the opinion of the matchmakers, so the girl was urgently put in order before their arrival.
She was healthy, became thin
However, it happened the other way around: a healthy bride was "spoiled" - as, for example, in the royal family of the Romanovs. When Mikhail Fedorovich looked for a poor noblewoman Maria Kholopova to be his wife, an unexpected illness happened to her: “she vomited and broke her insides and was swollen. And then she vomited. " The failed bride, along with her relatives, was exiled to Tobolsk. And the girl was given sweets with stale whipped cream and sour cream just at the suggestion of the groom's mother, nun Martha.
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Dress up for the exit
If a girl could not leave the walls of her parents' house alone, then a married woman had no right to go anywhere, even to church, without the permission of her husband. On the other hand, if she left the family nest, then in full dress: frowning his eyebrows, turning red and white, "moreover, it is so coarse and noticeable that it seems as if someone ran a handful of flour over their face and painted their cheeks red with a brush" (more about the standards of female beauty of the past - in the article "Women of Muscovy of the XVI-XVII centuries in the descriptions of their contemporaries").
F. Sychkov. On a visit. 1940 year
A married woman caught in fornication should be beaten with a whip, and then spend several days in a monastery, feeding on water and bread. After that, her husband beats her again for neglecting work at home. The husband who forgave the harlot should have been punished
The wives of noble people rode in closed carriages covered with red taffeta, where they "sat with the splendor of goddesses." The horse was decorated with fox tails. Servants ran nearby.
Quilting - in private
"Domostroy" (a set of rules and regulations of the 16th century) introduced some restrictions into the usual relationships. It was recommended to beat his wife "not in front of people, to teach in private" - "to beat politely with a whip, holding hands." Sounded in the collection and another appeal to humanity: "Do not hit by sight, not under the heart with a fist, not kick, not beat with a staff, no iron or wood." Because whoever "beats from the heart or from the rupture like this, there are many parables because of that: blindness and deafness, and the arm and leg are dislocated, and the finger, and headache, and dental disease, and in pregnant wives and children, injury occurs in the womb." Foreigners were amazed that for all that, "Russian wives saw heartfelt love in frequent beating and flogging, and in their absence, husbands' dislike and dislike for themselves."
N. Kasatkin. Who! 1897 year
A night with a strange woman is fornication, not adultery
If a married person spends the night with another woman, this is not adultery, but just fornication. An adulterer was one who had a long-term relationship with another man's wife or mistress and children from her on the side. True, other options were also considered - for example, in "Justice to the Metropolitan" (XII century) it was told about two wives living with one husband, and in "The Tale of the Murder of Daniel of Suzdal and the Beginning of Moscow" (XVII century) two "sons of the red" boyar The heaps "lush with the princess in demonic lust, tied up with the Sotonin law, depressing their body with fornication, lustful love, filth in adultery." The infidel was fined in favor of the church.
K. Trutovsky. In the hayloft. 1872 year
To the guest - vodka and a kiss
After the feast, dessert was waiting for the dear guest. As a sign of special respect and love for him, the magnificently dressed wife of the owner came out and served a glass of vodka with her own hand. This is how the Holstein ambassador Adam Olearius, who was visiting Count Lev Shlyakhovsky in 1643, describes this ritual: “His wife came out to us, very beautiful in face … and accompanied by a servant carrying a bottle of vodka and a glass. Upon entering, she first bowed her head in front of her husband, and then in front of me, ordered to pour a glass, sipped it and then brought it to me, and so on up to three times. After that, the count wished me to kiss her. Unaccustomed to such an honor, I only kissed her hand. He, however, wanted me to kiss her on the mouth. Therefore, in respect of a higher person, I had to accept this honor, consistent with their customs."
B. Kustodiev. Christianization. 1916 year
Dreaming is a excusable sin
“Nowhere, it seems, except Russia, there is, at least, that one type of incest has acquired the character of an almost normal everyday phenomenon, having received the appropriate technical name - dreamer,” wrote Vladimir Nabokov. This phenomenon, when the father-in-law lived with his son's wife, was widespread in Russian villages. It was facilitated by the long absences of their husbands leaving for soldiers or to earn money. It was almost always possible for the young father of the family to persuade the young father of the family to cohabit with persuasion or threats. The people did not condemn this matter, treated with understanding, said: “He loves his daughter-in-law. He lives with her as with his wife, he liked him."
Tired of my wife - go to the monastery
If family life has gone completely wrong and there is no hope for peace between the spouses, then one of them may go to a monastery. If the husband leaves, and his wife remarries, the deceased can become a clergyman, even if he previously brewed beer. If the wife is sterile, then, having sent her to the monastery, the man has the right to marry again after six weeks.
V. Maksimov. Family section. 1876 year
Starting a family for the fourth time was definitely illegal. The marriage was immediately terminated, and the priest, who married such a couple, even out of ignorance, was defrocked
In the code of norms of "dissolution" (divorce), which is part of the "Charter of Prince Yaroslav" (XIII century), the reasons for divorce from his wife were given: in the case of adultery confirmed by witnesses; communicating with strangers without permission; for an attempt on the life of her husband or failure to report the threat of such. The wife, in turn, could ask for a divorce if the faithful “slanderously accused her of treason” (without evidence). The reason could also be the long unknown absence of the other half, when the whereabouts are unknown.
The fourth marriage is illegal
Saint Gregory the Theologian said: "The first marriage is a law, the second is forgiveness of weakness for the sake of humanity, the third is a crime, the fourth is wickedness, there is a life of swine." Nevertheless, widowers and divorced people married - both for the third and the fourth time. The Church, although the third marriage and condemned, but still believed that it is better than living in sin. But the fourth in a row starting a family was definitely considered illegal. The marriage was subject to immediate dissolution, and the priest who married such a couple, even out of ignorance, was defrocked.
K. Makovsky. Wedding feast. 1883 year
If you want a wife - curtain icons
By fulfilling their marital duty, although it was a legal matter, they preferred not to offend the Lord. Before getting down to business, the pectoral cross was removed. If icons with the faces of saints hung in the room, they were carefully hung. On this day, it was preferable not to attend church, and if an insurmountable need arose, then only thoroughly washing yourself and changing into clean clothes.
The widow is the head of the family
A woman who lost her husband and never married again automatically received all those rights that she was deprived of in marriage. She managed the property, became a full-fledged mistress in her house and the head of the family, if there was one. Widows were respected in society.
Maria Anisimova