Life is arranged in such a way that from time to time we all face one or another problem. Someone relieves the stress accumulated during the day with a glass of alcohol. Someone swallows pills or starts complaining to everyone they meet about their difficult life … There are many means, but none of them brings relief. Where to seek salvation? We asked this question to psychologist Sergei Sumin.
- It is best to seek help from a specialist, such as a psychologist or psychotherapist.
By the way, Sergey Viktorovich, let's first define: what is the difference between a psychologist and a psychotherapist?
- A psychologist is a general concept, as they call any person involved in psychology, regardless of whether he conducts scientific research, teaches psychology, consults or accepts patients. Therefore, when choosing whom to go to, you should not pay attention to these subtleties: to improve relations with your husband, child or boss, relieve fears, relieve stress, and improve self-esteem, both a psychologist and a psychotherapist will help.
Is there a fundamental difference between a psychologist and a psychiatrist?
- Yes, and here confusion is inadmissible. A psychiatrist, like a neuropathologist, helps to solve psychological problems with medication. And if a psychotherapist and psychologist may not have a medical education, then a psychiatrist and a neuropathologist are doctors, and, in addition to talking with a patient, they must certainly conduct a serious examination. Do not be afraid of the pills: sometimes it is important to change the so-called psychological status, that is, relieve tension, anxiety, nervousness, so that the treatment goes faster and more successfully. Another question is that it is pointless to solve mental ailments and problems with medications alone: not a single pill will destroy an inferiority complex, raise self-esteem, teach people to communicate with people, and relieve fears. However, it is also important to consult a neurologist or psychiatrist becausethat this will allow in time to recognize disorders of the brain or nervous activity, if any.
Sergey Viktorovich, you say that when the problems are in a vice, you need to go to a psychotherapist. But many people are afraid of this. What if others, excuse me, will be mistaken for a psycho?
- Firstly, modern educated people are unlikely to react in such a way to such a step. And secondly, why would you notify everyone that you turned to a psychotherapist for help? When you go to a gynecologist or proctologist, do you inform the entire work collective about this?
Another thing is embarrassing: it is difficult to open your soul and tell everything about yourself to a stranger. How am I going to tell someone else's uncle or aunt what is going on in my family?
- And you remember the "companion syndrome", because to a random person with whom we were in the same compartment of the train, we can tell everything about ourselves, give out the most intimate secret. Why? Yes, because we know that we will never see this person again, which means that there is nothing to be ashamed of. It's the same with the psychotherapist: you come, work out your problems - and goodbye. The main thing is to get to such a specialist on time.
How to determine the moment? Sometimes it seems: everything, dead end, no more strength. But here the situation dissolves by itself or the right decision comes
- This happens because a person can and must solve most of his problems himself. A psychotherapist is the same doctor, you don't run to the doctor on the first day, as soon as your throat hurts. You will first rinse it, drink tea with honey and lemon, steam. And if there is no relief within a reasonable time, go to the clinic.
So it is here: the help of a psychotherapist is required when you feel that you are seriously entangled in contradictions and cannot find a way out on your own. If you tried with all your might to get out of a difficult situation, analyzed it, tried, but never found a way out.
Why is it necessary to have a psychotherapist? After all, many of us have successful, wise, experienced friends or relatives who are ready to listen and give advice. Why not discuss the situation with them?
"You see, there are several significant points." Firstly, your friend or girlfriend is a person who is interested, he is always on your side, therefore, he will not be able to be objective and see the whole situation. Secondly, not everything can be told to a loved one - somewhere you soften, keep silent. It is not for nothing that professional psychotherapists categorically refuse to advise their friends. Thirdly, the psychologist is able not only to analyze the situation, he knows many methods of correcting it, while your successful and wise friend can only one thing: to advise you on the way of solving that would suit him. And in general, the task of the psychotherapist is not at all to offer a ready-made recipe for solving your problem, but to help you get out of the crisis yourself, to find the only correct path yourself. And finally, not always the same complaintwith which a person turns to a psychologist is the root of his problem - and then only a specialist can find the true cause of the problem. For example, I recently had a lady at the reception who suffers from persistent insomnia. It took quite a long time to figure it out before we found what the root of evil was: she was so used to controlling the situation around her that she subconsciously forbids herself to sleep. It was with this that I had to work.
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How many visits to a psychologist is required to solve an average problem?
- In advance, without knowing either the problem itself or the person, it is impossible to say anything. Someone needs a couple of hours, others will have to meet with a psychotherapist for more than one month. It is also important which technique is chosen. There are one-time consultations when a specialist examines the problem with you for a long time, in detail, but once. In some cases, this is enough: if you just had to analyze the situation, place accents, help a person cope with emotions and understand in which direction to move on. There is psychoanalysis, which should be spent more than one year: it is a long and difficult, but the most reliable way to get rid of problems. There are areas of psychology created at the intersection of different sciences: genetics, physics, mathematics, where the method of analyzing the situation and the method of influencing pain points are calculated in a special way. Usually,such a course consists of 7-10 sessions. In a number of cases, group psycho-trainings are interesting and effective, including those based on the influence of different types of art: under the guidance of a trainer-psychologist, people with the help of movement, music, drawing, role-playing games, breathing exercises get rid of complexes, solve painful problems. By the way, such techniques are especially suitable for those who find it difficult to pour out their souls to someone else's uncle.
How do you feel about hypnosis?
- As one of many helper methods. Modern psychology rarely uses classical hypnosis: it is much more effective to work with a person when he is conscious. Much more popular is the so-called Ericksonian hypnosis, which allows you to enter a person into a light trance. On the one hand, the patient is fully aware of everything and in control of the situation, on the other hand, one can get to the problems that have been repressed from consciousness and solve them.
But how to understand if this psychotherapist will help you? How to choose your own?
- Of course, it is best to follow the recommendation: if this specialist helped someone of your acquaintances, if you received good reviews, this is to a certain extent the key to success. And yet the most important thing is your own impression of the first meeting. No matter how serious and experienced the psychotherapist is, if you do not have personal contact, if this person is not attractive to you, and even more so if he does not inspire confidence, say goodbye immediately: there will be no sense in treatment. And one more thing: the therapist should not act as your friend or girlfriend, his task is to keep his distance, while remaining calm and benevolent. And don't worry if you feel a little detached - this is a prerequisite for successful work with a patient.
Journal: Steps of the Oracle # 8. Author: Sergey Sumin, Max Maslin talked
