Extramarital affairs have been discouraged in virtually every culture in the world. Somewhere they were treated more severely, somewhere - softer. And what about this in Russia?
Pagan time
Before the adoption of Christianity, the status of a woman in marriage was determined by whether she was taken in marriage by means of abduction or by conspiracy with representatives of her family. The “snatched” woman was not given any rights, she was almost the personal property of her husband. A husband could punish such a woman for treason, as he pleased, even kill. But the husband himself was not limited in anything. In addition to the fact that polygamy flourished in Russia during the pagan period, many wealthy and noble men had concubines. If a woman was married by conspiracy with her relatives and received a dowry, she had more rights and could demand, for example, a divorce, if she was not satisfied with her husband's affairs on the side, but she herself had no right to any intrigues.
The Byzantine author Mauritius, describing the customs of the pagan Slavs, noted the chastity of women and mutual marital affection reigning in the families of the Slavs.
After the adoption of Christianity
The Orthodox Church insisted on the sanctity and inviolability of marriage. The woman, despite the fact that she was still completely subordinate to her husband, during this period nevertheless received some rights. Among them is the right to demand marital fidelity from a husband. However, after becoming Christians, men continued to cheat on their wives.
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It is known that for a long time among the nobility, despite the fierce condemnation from the Church, the custom was preserved to have not one family, but two or even more.
The laws of Yaroslav the Wise, dating back to the XI century, consider a husband's betrayal only when a man has children on the side. The punishment for such an offense is a fine.
In the XII century, the Novgorod deacon Kirik, as the church correspondence of that time shows, naively asked the bishop what cohabitation with a concubine is considered a sin: secret or overt?
The Old Russian priesthood was guided by the "Fatherland Rules" of Metropolitan John of Constantinople, where it was said that a man should be excommunicated from the Church "like without cold and without shame, two wives have." Nevertheless, society as a whole turned a blind eye to polygamy, especially when it came to princes. In the annals it is noted that the princes Svyatopolk Izyaslavich, Yaroslav Vsevolodovich, Yaroslav Vladimirovich Galitsky already had second wives and concubines in the Christian era. And, presumably, they were not exceptions. Noble and wealthy men allowed themselves to have concubines or second families until the 15th century. In 1427, Metropolitan Photius, in his epistle to the Pskovites, forbade the election of the Troyes as church elders. As is known, the wealthiest and most dignified people of the community applied for this position. In the message of Metropolitan Jonah,written about 1456 to the Vyatka clergy, there is a reproach that pastors do not denounce polygamists. There were cases, Jonah wrote, that some had up to seven wives.
The punishment for such "pranksters" was exclusively from the side of the Church. The guilty man for some time was not allowed to take communion, he was obliged to perform a certain number of prostrations to the ground, etc. At the same time, the king and other rich sinners could buy off penance by donating to the Church.
And women could not even think of such indulgences. Cheating on her husband, in contrast to cheating on his wife, was not a reason for divorce.
Exceptions to the rule
However, there were also exceptions. In the 12th century, the Galician prince Yaroslav Osmomysl fell in love with his concubine, who is called "Nastaska" in the chronicles, that for the sake of marrying her he decided to send his lawful wife, the daughter of Prince Yuri Dolgoruky, to a monastery. The boyars, learning about this, seized the concubine, the prince himself was locked up, and the unfortunate Nastaska was burned. After that, they took an oath from the prince that henceforth he would live with his wife "according to the law." However, in this act of the boyars one reads not so much a moral as a political motive. Yuri Dolgoruky could have been angry.
Another example tells about the condescending attitude of the husband to his wife. Mstislav Vladimirovich, the son of Vladimir Monomakh, as the historian Tatishchev says, "did not go to his wives sparingly." When he got old, his young wife indulged in some pranks. And in response to the remarks of those close to him, Mstislav supposedly said: "The princess, as a young man, wants to have fun and can, at the same time, perpetrate what is obscene, it is already inconvenient for me to guard against, but it is enough when no one knows and talks about it."