Women are created to give and spread love. Here is such a simple mission for us. At the same time, our strength is different. Someone in life must learn to warm at least a couple of hearts next to them - a husband and a child. Someone - at least only his own. And someone like Mother Teresa warms millions of hearts, and easily.
We have different power, different strength. Not everyone needs to warm millions, because to warm even one is already a feat. And to warm yourself up is often an impossible mission. Unfortunately. There is no "small" power, no "big". There is my personal path. Expressed by the number of loved ones who need my love. And that's all.
But there is one factor that breaks into our world and turns everything upside down. Its name is stress. Women's stress is more dangerous than men's. Do you know why? Because he turns our strength into the opposite. That is, let's say I have been given the power to warm three hearts next to me. And I'm stressed. And then I do not warm up three, but destroy. With your stress, vanity, fears, race. There are many reasons for stress.
That is, not only am I not fulfilling my mission, I am also crippling my loved ones. And I move even further away from myself. With the same power with which I am called to give love, I destroy it. And the stress is to blame.
This stress is very clearly visible in the New Year's hectic. Many people need to work harder. Especially if the work is seasonal. For example, hairdressers, manicurists, photographers, artists are in great demand before the New Year. Stores start working around the clock. And after all, someone works in them. Is such a job easy?
My friend is a manicure master. And she says that every December she has a blockage. Such that then all January you need to lie down and recuperate. I heard the same from photographers, hairdressers, beauticians. There is a lot of work at this time. Money too. But is this the main thing?
It turns out that even your favorite job at this time becomes a vampire and draws out all the juices. Especially if we are looking to make more money right now. Be in time. There are many orders so far. As long as there are clients…. Such a waste of energy creates vanity - there is little time! I can't do anything! Often, even yourself, you do not have time to bring beauty to such a run.
And it seems that you just have to endure, and then it will be good. Then, when this peak ends, you can rest. Exhale. Lie down. This alone is not enough. When we are drunk and exhausted, it takes us much longer to recover. It's like disease - prevention is cheaper than cure. And stress exhausts completely, to the end. And when we run out of strength, we begin to "vampire" loved ones.
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Then the husband finds himself in the situation "whatever the fool does, he does everything wrong." Children at this time receive not support, but reproaches and shouts. Parents at this time become the cause of all our troubles. All other people are annoying. And the saying “Nothing infuriates a woman like everyone else” is very appropriate. This is the true face of female stress.
During this time, we are losing a lot. A husband next to such a woman can neither work, nor earn money, nor be gentle and sensitive. He would rather hide in some kind of bomb shelter to survive. He will leave the house until late in the evening so that he is not injured by the fragments of her explosion. Children get sick, misbehave, and cause even more anxiety. Why worry about your husband, you just constantly get angry at him for such a detachment.
We lose the most important thing in stress. Time. Time to spend on love. Strength. Forces with which to inspire and delight. Yourself. We are moving further and further from our own path. Love. We simply cannot love, we switch to the mode of greed when we demand that very love from our loved ones.
Near a woman, in stress, you instantly empty yourself. She, like a traveler in the desert, greedily pounces on water - the energy of the person with whom she communicates. She herself does not understand how this happens. She wishes no harm - neither to her husband, nor children, nor girlfriends. It happens by itself. The instinct of self-preservation turns on - and everything that is possible is sucked out of the person standing next to him.
Recently I talked with one girl who has been such a source for her own mother all her life. She told how difficult it was to see my mother gray with exhaustion. How I wanted to save her and help her. How she hugged her and felt sorry for her mother. And mom was getting better from it. And she herself was almost always sick. And most of all diseases occurred at a time when my mother had a blockage at work.
Look around! Look at your life and if you:
- Working too much
- You work a hated job
- You never have time for anything
- You fall in the evening from fatigue
- Can't stand the whims of children
- Lose yourself when your husband asks you for something
- Get annoyed by talking to your friends
- You dream of hiding in a corner and so that no one touches you
- For the sake of earning money, you work more than you want, even if you love work
- All the time, hurry somewhere and fuss
- You notice that the husband is pushed into the sofa, and the children are constantly sick
- Constantly worry about anything
- Eat a lot - especially in the evenings and at night
Stop. You are stressed. You urgently need resuscitation. Reanimation is not an even greater race and achievement. And warm herbal tea in a massage parlor or bath. Good music, books, silence. Bed rest for several days. Energy saving mode.
Better yet, stop working. If you are doing what you love, do exactly as much as you enjoy. Don't chase after quantity and earnings. The word "earnings" immediately creates stress in the female body. If you can't work, try it. Suddenly like it. At least for a while. Indefinite vacation. When you get bored - start again. Fill your life with creativity - it's much more interesting and useful.
Take care of your loved ones. Stop in the New Year's race. Nobody dies if suddenly a child goes to one tree instead of ten. It's okay if there are not forty salads on the table, but only two. And even if you buy simple gifts for everyone with all your heart. And if you are not wearing the most expensive dress. Although no, let's buy the most beautiful dress. Or we will sew. But let's stop the toy shopping run. Most children already have more toys than they need. Better to make gifts with your own hands - both creativity and a minimum of stress.
Take care of your loved ones. You are made to give them love. This means that you must have this love inside. You must be full of it. Instead of fussing, relax. Love and haste are incompatible. As soon as you run ahead of the locomotive again, you will devastate your relatives again.
Relax. Prevention is cheaper than cure. Taking care of yourself until the moment you're completely exhausted will make things easier. It's easier to regain your strength when you are still able to move and think yourself. So find your own ways to dissolve stress. At first I wanted to write “dealing with stress,” but I realized that we don't need to fight. We need to fill our lives with something else to dissolve stress.
- Be creative - that you personally enjoy
- Chat with filled people (remember that empty people will drink you in five minutes)
- Take care of yourself and your body
- Pray and make pilgrimages
- Breathe! Do not forget to breathe deeply - you will not want to fuss with such breathing
- Give love from inner fullness and abundance.
Stress is very insidious. He is capable of destroying families, interfering with development and creation. He bares the wires in the shower. He pulls out of us not the best qualities - we become aggressive, angry, twitchy. And loved ones suffer from this. Those whom we had to warm with our warmth. The very ones whom the Lord has put into our caring hands. We are not allocated a certain power so that we destroy each other. This power and strength is needed for another. To love. And make each other happier.
Take care of yourself. Right now, while you still have strength. Prevention is cheaper than cure.
Olga Valyaeva