No one has ever created a masterpiece in one sitting. Even Mother Nature doesn't do everything right the first time. If she did everything right at once, prehistoric times would not be filled with silly and strange-looking prototypes of modern species, which seem to be doomed to failure from the very beginning.
Platibelodon, aka the Elephant with a giant trunk-mouth
Who knew that the quickest way to rob an elephant of all its greatness was to replace the trunk it carries around with it with a duck beak? About 10 million years ago, as evolution experimented with different species to see what came of them, several different test elephant species roamed the planet. But Platibelodon was the only one with a long rat tail and a huge ugly mouth.
Paleontologists allegedly have a long debate about why nature deliberately created an animal that looked like this. Some suspect that spatula-like canines were convenient for grabbing aquatic vegetation, but others are inclined to believe that platybelodon gripped tree branches with his mouth and then ripped off the bark from them with his funny teeth. But no matter what function his mouth performed, the platybelodon definitely sacrificed all aesthetics for her, because these elephants are a complete misunderstanding.
Shortened fangs were also of no use to them. This is the only formidable weapon that modern elephants possess, and nature decided: "What if you try to make them so short that they are completely useless, and then they will be such a" decoration "that will cause constant laughter?" The only reason these animals lived for so long is that the predators could only laugh and go further in search of some less ridiculous prey.
Helicopryon, or Shark with a ridiculous mouth
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Helicopryon is, in essence, a shark that lived 250 million years ago, with a circular saw in place of the lower jaw. Unfortunately, since the skeletal structure of a shark is almost exclusively cartilage, no one has ever found a more significant remains of a helicopryon than these sawtooth jaws that looked like they were from a cartoon. In fact, archaeologists initially believed that the mouth of the helicopryon they discovered was just ammonite. It was only later that they realized that their find was an important example of how Mother Nature tested how far she could go in the absurdity of what she creates.
Paleontologists are still trying to figure out how this shark ate with such a strange mouth. The main theory is that helicopryon used this flexible jaw as a whip, with which it grabbed schools of fish, and then pulled in what it managed to capture. But experts cannot agree on where the helicopryon kept its lower jaw when not using it to hunt prehistoric fish. This is why different artists depict this shark so differently that sometimes it is impossible to say that it is the same animal.
Initially, they concluded that the teeth were simply retracted under the jaw, but the most recent hypothesis is that the shark held them deep into the throat, since this is obviously always the best place to store deadly blades.
Caprosuchus (Kaprosuchus saharicus), or Long-legged crocodile
Anyone who has watched the Discovery Channel for more than two hours knows that crocodiles are formidable, deadly reptiles with sharp teeth … but only if they are about a meter and a half from the water. Moving three meters further, they transform into a 360-kilogram, slowly moving helpless piece of skin with sharp teeth at one end. The fact that crocodiles cannot, and certainly will not, chase you on the ground is very comforting, since otherwise the crocodile is a ruthless killer.
But 100 million years ago, this was not the case. Caprosuchus was an evolutionary attempt to endow one predator with all the advantages except the ability to fly, which made it absolutely invincible. Paleontologists often say in the order of things that they chased dinosaurs on their long legs, as if it were a common thing for crocodiles. In addition to the fact that the caprozuch has the unofficial name "crocodile-boar", it also received the nickname "dinosaur storm".
It's amazing how anyone could have escaped when these wingless dragons scampered across the ground and devoured everything around them. When the earth reached the Ice Age, it is quite logical that among the first changes that the species living on the planet underwent was the following: to make the crocodile weak at least in something.
Synthetoceras, or Horned Horse
Given that synthetoceras roamed the pastures of what is the modern state of Texas, it's a little angered that evolution spoiled what it could spoil, and gave us a boring horse as a symbol of the Wild West, when in their place could be this ancient view with a forked horn on the muzzle. Although it is very close to the camel, there is no reason to think that humans could not domesticate several of these animals. Now try to imagine the American story of cowboys riding Synthocerases in the light of the sun, or Indians who mounted their rifles in a slingshot on its face, aiming at the vans of the first settlers.
Of course, synthetoceras looks like a child invented it in a desperate attempt to spice up his love for unicorns. But there is no doubt that evolution had some reason to put the horn on the face of the Synthoceras. There is a theory among experts that they used these horns in battles with each other, and of course, this is completely boring.
Odontochelys semitestacea, or Turtle without shell
Evolution is lazy. One small change takes thousands of years, and even then it will be minimal. Take Odontochelys semitestacea. About 220 million years ago, turtles were just walking pieces of meat for predators. In the end, evolution stepped in and decided it was fair to provide the turtle with some kind of natural protection. Result? Just a hard abdomen.
Odontochelys semitestacea was usually attacked by some kind of sea monsters that lived in deep waters. As the predators attacked from below, the turtles that developed a shell on their belly survived longer. The only problem was that once the predator figured out how to attack from above, or even took the trouble to turn the turtle over, it was like putting food on a plate. If evolution somehow improved Odontochelys semitestacea, it only made it a prey for more sophisticated predators.
However, the remains of Odontochelys semitestacea helped paleontologists determine exactly how the full shell developed in turtles. They initially concluded that the thicker skin that had evolved into a hard carapace now looks more like an extension of the ridge and ribs that fused together to form a carapace over time. But, no matter how important the discovery of this species may be, it still looks like a naked turtle to us. As if she decided to swim in some ancient pond, leaving her shell on the shore.
Odobenocetops, or a whale with a walrus face
Although Mother Nature usually experiments with each animal species separately, she sometimes doesn't mind mixing two completely different species, just to see what happens. Sometimes the result is great when the best features of both are combined in one form, but in other cases the end product is such as odobenocetops, that is, a failed attempt to mix the two inhabitants of the ocean into a single whole.
In the Pliocene, about 3.5 million years ago, the odocetocetops was simply a whale with the head of a walrus, except that one of its fangs was much longer than the other, and its muzzle had an expression of eternal blues. A longer canine tooth could reach a length of about 90 centimeters, but as a defense against predators, it was absolutely useless, since it was too fragile. No one really knows why he had such strange, incongruous and ineffective fangs.
It cannot be overstated how helpless and unadapted these whales / walruses were in the prehistoric world in which they lived. For comparison: they lived in the same era as the megalodon shark, the most dangerous predator the size of a blue whale, with five rows of teeth in a two-meter jaw. Although it was technically a carnivore, the approvedcetops only ate shellfish and worms it pulled out of the sand. The sad expression on his face seemed to indicate that the approvedcetops knew how ridiculous he looked.
Gigantopithecus, or Bigfoot
It seems unfair that while different species of animals have undergone significant changes, the biggest change in human ancestors was the change in the inclination of the forehead. Unfortunately, evolution has never really experimented with giving primates hooves or venomous skin, so our physical variation seems rather insignificant compared to any animal.
At least that was until 1930, when a paleontologist discovered the teeth of a primate that was over 3 meters tall and weighed about 540 kilograms. For comparison, a male black-backed gorilla weighs about 180 kilograms. Gigantopithecus was larger than a polar bear and looked as suspicious as Bigfoot.
This giant monkey lived in the jungles of Southwest Asia, where it ate exclusively plants and fruits, judging by the shape of its teeth. Although it was very scary to meet such a monster in the jungle, there is a fairly high probability that our ancestors sometimes met them. Gigantopithecus and the first people lived at the same time and in the same area. Perhaps humans are to some extent responsible for their disappearance. Well, some things never change.