He looks from the canvas of Kramskoy with a mysterious look. Unapproachable, proud, closed - you just won't approach her, you won't get to know her - that's why she is "Unknown". So in life you can remain a mystery; swim in the landau, past admiring gazes, remaining a shadow in the dreams and desires of dozens or even hundreds of men … And then cry bitterly alone, washing off the makeup and removing the mask of the "Unknown".
LOOK VISOK
The stranger is good in the picture, beautiful! But you need to know that at first, according to some information, the artist wanted to expose the inaccessibility and hypocrisy of secular lionesses. And there are sketches for a picture where the young lady is not so beautiful at all - her face expresses arrogance and arrogance on the verge of insolent contempt for others. The look is full of stupid arrogance. After all, there is nothing good in inaccessibility. Inaccessibility is an arrogant and hostile attitude towards other people, which is characteristic of narrow-minded natures, who have gotten out of the rags to riches, "who have imagined themselves," as the people say.
Girls and women tend to confuse "inaccessibility" - chastity and purity, and "inaccessibility" - unwillingness to communicate normally with normal people, arrogance and arrogance. Although in reality there is no arrogance and arrogance - that is the paradox. There is a mask that a person put on and can no longer take off - after a relatively short period of time, a certain behavior is fixed. And it's hard to get out of the chosen role. And you won't tell anyone that this role was chosen for a simple reason - the fear of being injured.
“Inaccessible people are the most inaccessible,” said one philosopher, and he was absolutely right. Those who have communication problems, sensitive, vulnerable, shy people, those who are afraid of their own feelings become unapproachable, blush painfully, choose their words, shy at looking at him … Here is the mask that helps. However, those around us have no time to look under the mask - what we show to other people, they see. We show inaccessibility - and there are no people willing to attack the fortress. Express your feelings, look after, say words of love - but how does it get so cold that it doesn't seem like a little? And potential fans fearfully retreat to a safe distance. As one intelligent young man, he moved away from a beautiful stranger, whom he really liked as a student. He showed timid feelings,he showed the first signs of attention - but the icy look from above struck him very much. And the complete lack of feedback made it clear that the girl was not interested in dating. The young man stepped aside sadly; life is life. Even beautiful strangers are forgotten - although he knew the name, of course. And I saw it often. And he greeted … But the matter did not go further. The girl was waiting for another - so the young man thought. A handsome prince or a knight from a fairy tale, and not at all a poor peer student. And twenty-five years later they met again - the expression on the face of the "stranger" remained the same … Although the face itself has changed, of course; years do not paint beautiful strangers. And they got to know each other, talked about the past; and she said that she had once liked the young man very much. But she could not show it, because a real lady must be unapproachable!Her heart should be won with rich sacrifices, deeds, glory, and then on her knees to ask for her hand and heart! So her mother and grandmother told her from childhood. After that, she gave out the number for the coat and looked at the man with a cold and arrogant look - she could not look otherwise. And she was left alone at the wardrobe counter, against the background of someone else's clothes and hangers … So the best part of life passed, and all because the game of inaccessibility does not lead to good.that the game of inaccessibility does not lead to good.that the game of inaccessibility does not lead to good.
WHAT MEN DO NOT FORGIVE
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Some ladies have strange ideas about the relationship between a man and a woman: a man must besiege an impregnable fortress. Win love and sympathy. Throwing trophies obtained in battle and the heads of the Saracens at their feet … Everything is not so in life; and a person feels if he is attractive to us in a few seconds. In a few short seconds, you can scald your eyes and douse them with cold so that interest fades away. Or make you keep a safe distance, admire silks, feathers or just cute curls on the back of your head from afar. You can devote poetry to such "Unknown", but to hug her, kiss her - hardly anyone will dare to do this! And over the years, the series of fans thinns; already few people pay attention to faded beauty; and it never occurs to anyone that an unapproachable person is crying bitterly from loneliness, and says, like Doctor Samoylenko in Chekhov:“God would send me even a lopsided old woman!”, Even an old man … And the end of Krylov's instructive fable sounds not bitter, but even reassuring: “I'm glad, I was glad that I married a cripple!” - this is about a discerning bride. But unapproachable girls do not reach the position of a bride - as a rule, all communications are torn after the first glance, turning the head, metallic notes in the voice … A man can survive and forgive anything; but neglect cannot! And inaccessibility is perceived precisely as neglect. Even the great artist perceived the Unknown in this way! And I wanted to fill her portrait with an edifying meaning - how not to behave! And, just looking at the face on the canvas for a long time, with every brush stroke, he began to understand - this is not a cold aristocrat! Not a rich cocotte at all, who looks with contempt at a possible admirer. It is a suffering heart full of love; and the mask of arrogance is just an attempt to protect yourself and your soul. And the second version associated with the portrait is the story of an abandoned and deceived girl who died young - her feelings were trampled, her heart was broken. And the artist understood - he even gave the model the features of his own daughter. And the portrait is fundamentally different from the sketch; there is no arrogance or arrogance, there is a gentle beauty that tries to defend itself. And there is no arrogance in the look - there is myopic confusion, the need for understanding and protection …And the portrait is fundamentally different from the sketch; there is no arrogance or arrogance, there is a gentle beauty that tries to defend itself. And there is no arrogance in the look - there is myopic confusion, the need for understanding and protection …And the portrait is fundamentally different from the sketch; there is no arrogance or arrogance, there is a gentle beauty that tries to defend itself. And there is no arrogance in the look - there is myopic confusion, the need for understanding and protection …
WELL, AND CARRY WITH YOUR SECRET
Even a talented portrait painter did not immediately guess what kind of girl was in front of him. And a long psychological path lies between the first, almost caricatured, sketches and the portrait itself, which bewitches hearts with its secret … What can we say about the fast-flowing life? People do not have much time to understand the other and look under the mask. Impatient - well, let's not touch it, since you call yourself that. Stranger - we will not get acquainted so as not to violate the secret, not to show unnecessary obsession. Do not laugh - we will not try to make you smile, otherwise they will cut off your head, like in a fairy tale … After all, all these roles are a live broadcast of a simple message: leave me! You don't deserve me! My secret belongs only to me! Well, and rush with your secret - this is how human hearts respond. Especially men.
A simple experiment was conducted by asking men to choose the most attractive woman in the group. The most beautiful and desirable! The opinions of the men turned out to be simple: the lady who smiled at them and expressed attention seemed to them the most beautiful and attractive. She was the most beautiful! That's the way men are. And the "ideal" models, touchy, somehow did not like. And nothing can be done about it, biology, psychology, the theory of sexuality … As the Italian mafiosi say, "you can catch more flies with sugar than with vinegar" …
It is necessary to teach a person to communicate correctly, and not to play this or that role. We are not on stage, despite the classic's metaphor that “life is theater”. Life is just life; it is not as good, but not as bad as it seems, as Maupassant wrote. And one can bitterly regret the fruitless years passed. And, realizing himself, set off to catch up - to look for at least some partner in dreams of a husband, children, family, others have already had grandchildren! But the bad thing is that the usual skills of communication with the opposite sex are irretrievably lost, as a rule. And the cold, learned look remained. And already, against her will, a woman looks like that, secretly dreaming - a prince will appear and disenchant her! Or that faithful knight, whom she once rejected, will return. But knights don't usually come back. Knights have always been in price, and now they are in special demand.
Psychologist Anna Kiryanova